Jen and I are now the only couple I know to have had a surprise wedding party.

Tonight was our farewell party with Shinji Saito and his merry band. Jen's friend Meg also came, which was excellent... she is basically, as far as I can tell, a slightly older Japanese version of Jen. As one might guess, I approve of that quite well. Anyway, being the wacky sorts they are, Shinji and Konno (the owner of the house we had the party at) and cohorts did not give us a very clear inclination to what manner of party it was going to be. All we knew, in fact, was that it was a farewell party and that we were expected to wear kimono at the beginning, for photographs.

Well, it turns out... we are married in Japan now. OK, only ceremonially, not legally, but still. It's the thought that counts. On the drive over, Shinji told Meg in Japanese that it was Jen and my wedding ceremony she was coming to attend! I was, needless to say, a little shocked to learn I was getting married already! But, I suppose, I have already proposed and Jen accepted, so we are after all betrothed to wed. All's fair in love and war. And wedding ceremonies.

We arrived, and were promptly gowned in fancy-pants kimonos. Wait, fancy pants kimono is a contradiction. We were gowned in fancy-kimono kimonos. You get the idea. Jen's kimono was a beautiful setup in orange silks with embroidered flowers in tasteful locations. Her obi (that is to say, the belty bit) was ... well, words don't describe. It was amazing. I've never seen anything so beautiful. Once she came out and we were all suitable flabbergasted, I was sent into the change room and transformed from Layabout Unemployed Assistant Language Teacher into Fantastic Mr. Samurai. Shinji lent me his 4-generation old family ... I am not sure how to translate this into english. Ohaka. Skirt. Samurai skirt. Kilt? Sure, let's call it a j-kilt. He lent me his 100 year old J-kilt for my wedding to Jen.

This is where things get hard to describe. First, of course, tons of pictures were taken of us in our fancy garb. I will post a few sooner or later but since the main computer is packed it's hard to upload them right now. My lovely wife will not let me forget. Besides that, what is tough, is that this was a silly joke ceremony, but at the same time it was serious. Of course, we're not really married. But still, our friends here wanted a chance to see our ceremony. Moreover, they wanted us to experience and see a japanese wedding, not as observers and third wheels like we usually are, but as the main participants. And finally, "sayonara yori omedetou", it's better to congratulate than to bid farewell. Saitou-san's wife thought that up, and she was right. It was a lot more fun for us to accept everyone's congratulations than to spend the evening in morose goodbyes. We're never going to forget that.

So. The Ceremony. After the photos were finally done (not that I did not enjoy posing as a samurai!) Mr. Konno, the carpenter whose home we were partying at and a good friend of Mr. Saito's, strode up in full Japanese Shinto Priest regalia... the regalia being made, of course, of cardboard, paper, and copious felt marker designs. It was indescribably amazing that such a wealthy, successful man could so happily present such a fun and undignified face for everyone's enjoyment including ours. He waved his Shinto Blessing Stick around, said a bunch of things that I couldn't understand, and Voila! we were married! Yay!

Then we drank japanese sake from a huge flat bowl. Thanks to Jen's friend Meg we had some idea what was going on, so we knew to drink three sips of the booze and pass it on. Well, I had to pass it on. Jen got the passing on to. After that, everyone got to drink. Such is Japanese tradition, and more power to them. Then went a few more blessings, this time for everyone, then a few speeches, a kampai (I still can't quite tell the difference between a kampai and a toast. Someone gives a speech and then everyone clinks glasses. Same deal either way), and then a traditional dancer showed up.

Yeah, a traditional dancer. I told you, this wasn't all cardboard and felt pen. Our friends got a traditional wedding dancer to attend, to dance the centuries old traditional blessing dance for a wedding. She came in an incredible kimono and danced the local Miyagi wedding dance. She is a sensei of the dance, and teaches it to Junior High School students in the region. I've never really realised what kind of physical control those Japanese traditional dances take, having only ever seen them performed well on video before. In person, one really gets a clear picture of the effort involved.

After the dancer finished her routine, we were given several wedding gifts to figure out how to send home. There's no chance in hell we are not getting these things sent to Canada, not because they are in themselves wonderful (though they are) but because this was an experience we do not want to lose any part of.

After the gift exchange, I gave a short speech, and Jen an even shorter one that was cut short by some tears. Thankfully it was Jen whose speech was cut short by tears and my manliness was not called into question. Thankfully. So, being a girly sort of person, Jen was okay and everyone thought it was very comely and sweet that she had such strong feelings. She retreated to change out of her kimono and into some normal clothes, and when she returned I followed suit. Mrs. Konno, who was helping us with the kimono, remarked to me how moved she was by Jen's tears. I told her that it was all I could manage to maintain my manly composure, which she found somewhat candid and amusing. I think. I don't actually know the Japanese word for "candid", so I am kinda just assuming here.

Once we were relegated to earthly clothing, everything felt much more .... real? I guess that is the best word. More relaxed, anyway. We were no longer quite so on the spot, although we remained the target of jokes, speeches, and comments throughout the evening, so all you people planning your embarrassing wedding stories, be aware we are immune to your efforts as we have been subjected already. That does not mean you should try harder to think of something horrid. I digress.

After we had a chance to eat... and by the way, the food was amazing! Someone must have been listening when I remarked that Jen preferes maki (wrapped) sushi over nigiri (ball) sushi, because there was a great selection of delectable wrap sushi and numerous fantastic salt pickles. Mrs. Saito's salt pickles, which Shinji knows very well I can eat until I pass out and keep eating in my sleep until I explode. They are, I mean to say, quite tasty. It was like a custom made feast. In fact I suspect it was not "like" a custom made feast so much as actually being such a feast. During this feast we opened the presents. Mainly they consisted of tableware, which might sound lame to you if you are in fact a lame person, but to us it was pretty f*in wicked. It was very pretty stuff. I'm not sure exactly how to describe it and I have already written too much and have a long way to go, so let's just leave it at "f*in wicked" for the main body.

In the more amusing genre, Mr. Shibata, Shinji's hard-drinkin', funny-speechin', Judo-fightin' farmer friend, gave me a ... well, an apron. It's a really cool apron. I don't think you realise how cool an apron it is. I wore it all night. It's the kind of apron that is popular with the young folk these days, Meg told us. It's also rare, and Shinji thinks it will be the only one of its kind in Canada, when we take it home; possibly in all of North America. So there!

Jen got an apron too, less unique but a heck of a lot more cute. It's a Japanese kitchen smock, and it's very pretty and lacy and high quality. Much like Jen. Also with it, we got a flag. It's a blue streamer from the tatemae at Saito's house on the 5th. According to Shinji (he told me this before we received the flag and I was totally confused then, but pieced it together after), the blue flag is the luckiest flag of the tatemae streamers, and he gave it to us for Jen to wrap around her belly when she is pregnant, and to wrap the baby in when it is born.

I can't tell you how moved we are by this. Maybe it sounds silly in text, but these people are so close to us. I don't want to leave them, but we have to.

The rest of the night was general drinking and carousing, the likes you've probably seen. A few of my junior high students from Icchu came by, which was a nice surprise. First, the neighbourhood boys popped in to drink some cola, listen to Mr. Shibata spout advice, and get their photos taken. They had an awkward but amusing time,Ｉ think. Then, Nana Saito - no relation to Shinji but to another Saito that was there - came by. I was very glad to see her! I know her well, she is a second year student and I have noticed her a lot. She's keen and genki, a bit quiet so I didn't remember her name before today too well, but I knew her face. I was really glad to get a chance to meet her and her family on their own terms a little. It turns out Nana is a pianist of some calibre, and I will be sending her a little book of Canadian piano music as soon as I get a chance, I hope.

We had an amazing night. In the end, everyone went home, Shinji drank a bit too much and fell asleep, there were some almost tearful goodbyes, and it all came to a close. I can't believe we're leaving... and I can't believe how amazing these people are. Our friends.